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Posted on Monday, April 25th, 2011
I have been very open an honest with my 3 kids ages 17, 15, and 9.
I too have never made them feel they have had to do anything that is uncomfortable to them, like coming to the hospital when I was in there for six days. My son especially who has such a phobia of needles and hospital, but to my surprise he came twice. I don’t bring up the cancer unless they ask and have told them if they have questions to ask but I don’t push it. For the most part they all just treat me like mom, still wanting to wrestle around and make me laugh. They don’t look at it like mom isn’t going to be around they are fully confident I will be here to nag them for years to come. My little troopers.
I have been completely open about it with everyone including my kids – 13 and 16 yrs old. It is easier to face every step or complication if we all cheer on together. It meant that we needed help for them too as they felt so anxious but they got through it and became so independent and strong – in fact my daughter lead the Relay for Life team at her school. They were not keen on coming to the hospital and I never made them step beyond their comfort zone but there were no secrets and my friends and relatives never had to filter what to say.
The biggest hurdle came when I had severe BRCA mutations discovered and again, I told them that they would need testing and it meant that they had to lead a very healthy lifestyle too. You would be surprised at the positive outlook that we can learn from GenX teens – the optimism for treatments in the future and beating this disease is something they remind me.
My kids are all grown adults now and live in other towns, but I called each one of them and spoke with them at length about my diagnosis of Stage 1, Non-Small Cell Carcinoma. My youngest (turned 26 today) came down and stayed overnight with me the day I was discharged and she also calls me every day. The other two phone me every few days to check on me. Even their father calls me every few days to see how I’m doing, and he just got out of hospital on November 29, 2011 after almost 8 months in hospital and rehab as well as being in a come for over 4 months due to strokes and seizures! The kids didn’t get a change to breathe before I was diagnosed a month later!
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With my children, I have been:|Avec mes enfants, j’ai :
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